finally telling that person those three words for the first time is such a rush
will they feel the same?
in this case, they do
everything is great
over time the bond builds stronger
you learn more about each other
you know each others’ minds and bodies like no one else
the passion has grown over all the time passed since you first uttered those three words
so I ask you, are those same three words enough to satisfy you still?
they’re the same words that when reciprocated had made that moment spectacular
they’re the only words you had hoped to hear at that time
but for some reason, do you feel like something is missing if you hear those words alone?
they almost seem simple now
love for someone changes dramatically over time
and after all this time together, shouldn’t there be more to those three words
with all the time that’s passed, you both should be able to personalize those words to mean so much more
say those words in a way no one else could to that person
because it seems now that:
anyone can say “i love you”
"New year, new beginnings"
It’s really such a cliche. There’s no reason a person should have to wait for a certain day to make a change in their life. Change isn’t something you can choose to start immediately. It’s gradual.
Nonetheless, the start of a new year is a big motivator to make a change. A brand new calendar year is like a clean slate. Similar to a do-over, except you get to retain everything you’ve learned.
I always place others so much higher than myself and this really does bring me that much lower. It’s fine to have those who inspire you. But I’m doing it in a way in which I’m destroying my own esteem. I hope that I can become more confident in myself. It’ll get me further in the long run and it’ll also help me a more
I feel like I’ve tried to achieve happiness in means that are only effective short-term. Appearances and materialism can only take you so far. I hope I can find it in myself to bring out the quality inside me. I want to make something of myself and I want to be proud of the person I am.
The more I care
The more vulnerable I get
I can feel myself losing it, slipping
My anxiety attacks are back
I almost forgot how hard they are to get through
I hate my mood swings the most
If not that, then what I hate most is how I want to hurt myself
I need to pull myself together
Focus on what’s good
Focus on what makes me happy:
My family, my friends, my art, and music
I feel like it’s possibly for anyone to fall in love
You just have to get close to someone
You have to let them in
Let them know who you are
Let them know parts of you that you don’t know yourself
That’s the fun part, getting to know what’s underneath
You discover a whole new layer of personality
Dreams, secrets, goals, memories
Things not many people know
This person knows so much about you
And you know so much about them
You care about each other
You want to see each other happy
And slowly you fall in love
Then each of you have a new goal
To make each other happy
Something about me has changed. I’ve become dependent. Attached and vulnerable. I doubt myself. I seek approval from others.
That’s not how it’s supposed to be.
Before I used to know who I am, who I want to be. I had goals. I was focused. I upheld myself. My priorities were clear. I was able to rebuff negative comments because I was confident.
What happened? What caused this change?
Do I care too much?
It’s happening again.
The bad thoughts are back.
I want everything to please stop.
I’m tired of being awake in the middle of the night worrying about how I’m doing this whole living thing. I’m tired of sleeping all day and still being tired. I’m tired of always being tired.
I don’t like having poofy, red eyes. I don’t like not knowing how to talk about it. I don’t like feeling like nothing I do is enough.
I can’t do this.
Lately every thing has been
None of these thoughts are healthy
Why am I like this again
It’s an odd feeling to know you aren’t important to the people who are important to you. I suppose it doesn’t really matter. I’ll care for the person no matter what. I’ll always be a friend to them even if they aren’t a friend to me. I’ll always care. But it’s also nice when the person cares back… ya know?